Christianity and Oral Sex?

Reaching way back into my collection of old questions and answers …

Question – “I and my wife have recently turn our lives over to Christ, she asked me a question that I don’t feel comfortable with asking my pastor (I am praying for more courage), is oral sex permissible in a Christian marriage?”

Reply – Thanks for the question.  Oral sex can be an issue like smoking marijuana – it is not explicitly identified in the Bible, so what is the Biblical understanding?  Thankfully, it can also be answered the same way – what are the Biblical principles and truths that are directly related? Sex, by its very nature, involves our whole being (physically, mentally, emotionally, etc.) – this is in part why it is reserved for the marriage context. When two people get married, (“become one”) part of the “oneness” is the experience of sex, whether it is oral or not.  There does not seem to be anything in the Bible that would indicate that oral sex would be any different than regular (for lack of a better word!) sex.  Any area like this should be influenced by the Holy Spirit – if the people who are involved in an activity (in this case, you and your wife alone) sense that the Spirit (often through your conscience) is indicating that the activity is wrong, then you should stop until you sense that he is saying that the activity is okay.  If neither of you has the legitimate sense that oral sex in your marriage is somehow inappropriate, then you should be free to enjoy each other’s body – this is one aspect of marriage that makes it so powerful (and so exclusive).

Any thoughts?  🙂


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69 Replies to “Christianity and Oral Sex?”

  1. But God said the marriage bed is undefiled So who are we to say that something is defiled if God says it isn’t just like he told Peter don’t call something unclean that I’ve said is clean. God created us. He knows a very intent of our heart. He gave the ground rules. No boys or boys or men with men or girls with girls. But if a man and woman be joined in marriage at one and marriage bed is undefiled I’m sure in his infinite wisdom he would have known that men and women were going to explore.

  2. As a married Christian wife, I think oral sex is wrong. Sodomy is unnatural sex (oral and anal) between the same sex and opposite sex. God is no respector of persons according to the Word of God. Sodomites cannot enter into the kingdom of heaven. Sodomites are people who practice sodomy acts such as oral and anal sex. What goes for the homosexuals, bisexuals, and lesbians also goes for married couples period….sin is sin…sodomy is a sin. The marriage bed is defiled when you allow oral sex, and anal sex in your bed, which leads to an open door for sexual perversions. It can lead to pornography and other sexual fantasies in a persons mind. Christians suppose to be just like Jesus, not using their mouth on reproductive organs and penis in the anus. That is filthy and filth comes from the Devil….there is nothing holy, undefile ( as people say the bed undefiled), or pure about that. The Devil has so many people and Christians deceive that this is okay for married couples because he want to compete with God by deceiving people about the real purpose for sex such as child bearing and the beauty of having natural, pure, and enjoyable sex with their mates. Oral and anal sex is unnatural, impure, and unholy which comes from the Devil, not God. I have seen marriages destroyed because of one spouse opposing it, and the other liking it. If the spouse that likes oral and anal sex is not receiving it from their spouses, they would go and find someone who would perform these acts on them, which eventually lead to a divorce. If oral and anal sex is not a sin, why is people getting STD from mouth and AIDS from anal and reproductive organs? I hope this will help someone in Jesus

    1. Spot in Risa! You must have eyes to see and ears to hear to know this truth. Oral and anal sex (sodomy) is an open door to sexual perversion and seducing spirits.

  3. Allow me to give you an alternate perspective. My husband and I have enjoyed this form of mutual giving since the dawn of our relationship. I cannot speak for fellatio, however, cunnilingus is the single most intense sexual pleasure a woman can experience, and it offends me deeply that anybody would try to discourage it with ‘the danger it presents to the health of the individual.’ This is merely a mechanism by which Christians preach their anti-pleasure and pro-suffering doctrine. It has Christian sadism written all over it.
    Whilst I am all for advising people on safe sex and safe sexual practise, comments implying that oral pleasuring is dangerous is clearly aimed at causing people to feel guilty about their own loving sensuality.
    Oral sex is the most effective means of arousal and foreplay, the most deeply pleasurable form of giving, of sexual selflessness and sensual love. You have no right – or reason – to insult it in such a cruel and repressive manner and neither do you have any right to attack the lovers of this world with an onslaught of unjustified guilt.
    Perhaps you should read your Bible and learn of a God who demanded slavery, made provisions for the beating of slaves to death (Exodus: 21:20-21), copious incidents of genocide and infanticide in his name, including dashing little babies against rocks and tearing the unborn from the wombs of their mothers (Psalm 137:9; Isaiah 13:16; Hosea 13:16) the rape of innocent women either as the spoils of war (Numbers 31:18) or as a punishment to their unruly husbands (2 Samuel 12:11-14; Zechariah 14:2) numerous incidents of animal cruelty and the worst of all, exclusive to the New Testament – the eternal torture of any who dare to disagree.

    You will make excuses for all of the above, even where there are no justifications – and yet you condemn sexual pleasuring?

    Shame be upon you…


    1. Uncleaness,simply put this act is unclean and just because you are married does not change the fact that you are ingesting bodily waste.If Jesus warns against uncleaness I would take your time to dicern the word.And just because it feels good does not mean it is good.

  4. About oral sex – many people say it is good and they want to do it. It is true the feelings have been coming as really love my wife. One thing we should never forget – that we live not in recreation center but we are as ship among wolfs, we are on the enemy’s ground and we are tempted all the time. Unclean spirits work mostly though feelings and thoughts, plus arranging some events in your life. The battle for clean life is very important. Every unclean act has tremendous effect as unclean body gives a lot of power to the unclean spirits/demons. It is a fact that all demon possessed have done something to their body.
    As I said – I have great desire to perform oral to my wife even if she would not respond back, but the option to get something really nasty is what puts the breaks.
    And this it what the Bible says: the fear from God is the beginning of wisdom. The body can want all kind of things, but only the ones that do not follow the body but the Spirit have no condemnation Rom 8.

  5. Just to add about sodome – Lot offered his daughters and the men refused.
    This shows clear their intent – it wasn’t misbehavior with opposite sex but exactly with same sex.
    Again – I am not for oral, but please stay in the true facts.

  6. Hi, just to mention – there are very good ideas here.
    To mention about sodom and gomora – there is no historical or biblical evidence or facts about what was going on except homosexuality which is evident from Lots experience.
    About the verse that all is ok in marriage – please read the whole place there and if necessary check the original text – there could be whole a lot of wrong things in marriage. The bible and real life can show this.
    Not that I approve oral.
    The only thing that is not approved about oral is cleanliness. Every married man can testify that he would kiss his wife almost everywhere except a few spots 🙂

  7. Hi Mark (anyone):
    Would appreciate thoughts/clarification on 1 Cor.6:9-10 which states, “Do you know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God”. As much as it sounds straight forward, I’m trying to reconcile what appears to be clear direction not to engage in oral sex. The initial posting may seem contrary. Thanks.

    a) sodomite: one who practices sodomy
    b) sodomy: anal or oral copulation with a member of the same or opposite sex

  8. i’ve always thought oral sex was wrong seeing as the Lord gave us mouths to pray, preach, profesy, give praise and worship, i didn’t think oral sex was in anyway giving glory to God. If you’re asking such a question as to whether it is right or wrong then you have some doubts in this area then maybe deep down in your spirit, you feel that it isn’t the will of God to do it. Then again, this is just my opinion

  9. Anything in excessive can be harmful, so it is highly unlikely that oral sex in itself causes throat cancer. I really doubt that Christian couples intend and doing some of the bizzar acts that can affect the body in that negative way. In addition i believe you should read songs of Solomon it speaks to the intimacy of marriage and in my own opinion a lot of questions can be answer in that book alone.

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